Warning: I'm sorry if you are offended with my post. It's just a reflection on my experience over the past year. We've enjoyed Prattville but we have definitely had our struggles. Prattville, AL has been great. We love the area and are so glad that the Lord led us to Prattville over Montgomery. We've been blessed with a great house, a pretty good daycare (nap time I don't agree with) that was very close, and a good-fitting church for us. All that said, I leave AL with a handful of acquaintances and that's it. I would say I have a friend a but it's more like a one-way friendship that I value more than her. It's so hard being military and moving so often. Last June my best friend moved away and then we moved from FL to AL. I work from my computer so there is no communication or friendships through that. The boys go to daycare so there are no playdate friends. We live in a somewhat small town where everyone has grown up most of their lives. They have been friends for years and it's very hard to break in to that type of group/setting. Everyone here has been super nice and helpful but it's hard to break in to established circles. I already had my guard up. I just lost my best friend and that is such a life adjustment. Maintaining relationships over phone is just difficult. I don't like the phone. I was adjusting to life without my best friend and a tad scared to try and make new strong friendships knowing I was leaving again in 11-12 months.
I began to have a good friendship with someone from Aiden's daycare and then for an unknown reason (to me) that dissolved. She has lots of family and friends here and doesn't 'need' me as a friend. There are 2-3 people from church that I feel I could ask for help and they would do it. In fact, there were a few times I had to ask for help which was embarrassing but the situation called for it. I've had numerous medical problems this year and was in a bind a few times where either base sent me to the ER or it was medically necessary for me to go the ER. I was always alone because someone needed to be with the kids. In fact, I had to send an e-mail message out to the spouses of the guys in school who live in Prattville who wanted to start a running group (I was one of the co-leaders) to find someone to take me to the hospital at 5:30am and stay with me for a bit so I could get a procedure done. Brad needed to stay at the house with the boys and take them to daycare when it opened. How crazy and embarrassing.
Brad and I have had 3 date nights over the past year!! One happened when my dad came to visit, one happened when my mom came to visit, and the other happened a few hours after being discharged from the hospital and our Cubbies helper, Jessica, and her sister came to watch the boys. We didn't even make connections to find a babysitter. Our pastor and his wife would do anything I think if we asked which brings some peace of mind. People from Prattville tend to stay in Prattville. I can't even imagine having family around all the time. I think people greatly underestimate and/or don't appreciate the ability to have family near. Whether it's for a hug from a relative, help with children, help with a medical problem, etc, that is something many military families do not get the privilege of having.
It's been difficult here. I leave without really making an impact on anyone's life. People are comfortable in their own circles and don't realize how tight-knit their circles are. Being a military family has it's normal challenges of moving all the time, making and leaving friends, and for us, having to re-work the wheel of medical treatment which is very frustrating every time we move. The orders that we currently have are hard. They are 10-11 month orders. It's not long enough to truly make friends because when people hear we are military and are here for school, it seems like they automatically put up "I'm not going to get to know you because you are leaving soon" walls.
I am excited to be leaving and going to a place where we can stay for 2 years. I'm excited I have a few friends and am excited to make new ones.
I'm sure I offended some people. I'm sorry but this really is how our time in Prattville felt. There are some sweet, nice people here but everyone is pretty busy with their already established lives and friends which is great ... if you aren't moving all the time and trying to make new connections and friends. I think it would be fine to come to Prattville and move here for a while; I think it's possible to break in to those tight circles of friends eventually.
No comments:
Post a Comment